Mechanical Mishap
You’ve quite literally swallowed a muffler. Your face is permanently encumbered. Eating takes a lot longer, you have a pipe sticking out of your mouth and all.
But hey, at least your coughs aren’t as loud as before.
It is the future, I want my hover-cars, and hover-boards, and where has all the neon gone? Surely the government has publicly release flying-saucer technology by now…
a few traits…
Coffee Addiction - You have to be under constant effect of “enjoyed caffeine”. If the effect runs out, the trait turns to Jittery until caffeine is ingested once again.
Chocolate Addiction - Be under constant effect of “enjoyed chocolate” or face misery (substantial morale penalty).
Compulsive Gum Chewer - Consumes carried chewing gun automatically. Focus and Perception penalties if the gum runs out.
Bad Dental Hygiene - Multiple cavities. Severe pain at all times. Additional pain every time food or drinks are consumed. Occasionally develop a head infection.
[quote=“Slax, post:2321, topic:3101”]Mechanical Mishap
You’ve quite literally swallowed a muffler. Your face is permanently encumbered. Eating takes a lot longer, you have a pipe sticking out of your mouth and all.
But hey, at least your coughs aren’t as loud as before.[/quote]
This might just be my favourite idea for a mutation ever. Also the stupidest. I think that it should come with a permanent -3 intelligence bonus. Also how the hell would you be able to talk?
Okay what terrible idea can I come up with? Space portal? No, played out too often.
Exuberant excavator enemy? One that digs fervently, through the z-levels, often excavating deep pits on roads, so that unsuspecting survivors end up falling down six z-levels and starving to death slowly?
Nah, that sounds like something that would end too many people’s games too quickly…
How about an item that seems to be the item that you want, but when you need it, it turns into something useless?..
That’s a SCP, I’m almost certain…
Hell, how bout we have a statue that moves whenever it’s offscreen and kills you when you’re turned away. Given that the survivor is never turned away from anything, it seems dumb…
Screw that actually. That’s a shitty power, practically a one trick mary-sue enemy.
How about we find some particularly valuable metal if we dig down really really deep. Maybe it should be bright cyan. It should weigh very little, maintain a great edge, and be protected by magma and demons…
That’s A, a great idea, B, from another game. C… Sounds awesome anyway right?
Oh, I know, how about really hardcore porn that disturbs the survivor the first few times they find it. Nah. I don’t want to write the descriptions…
How about a drill for vehicles aimed the same way as flashlights? You know, so that you can make your folding bike a tunnel boring machine and run around the sewers creating secret passageways.
Nah, I intend to implement that one…
OH I KNOW! how about a drink that gets you drunk IRL? GREAT AMIRIGHT?
Well, drinking-game mode would be a possibility. It could have a list, you choose items from it, say, you are building a solar car, and need an electric engine, so you turn on “find a solar car with no engine” And you are feeling bored so you add “kill a zombie child” and “get hit by a zombie hulk” and there is a couple of libraries on your path so you throw in “find a crafting book, all the recipes from which are already known” and set off on your adventure. Every time one of the selected events occurs, the game prints “chug” and pauses for a few seconds. And for bonus points, sometimes when the mode is running, it will add extra items to the list, just for random Fun.
[quote=“jaked122, post:2324, topic:3101”]Hell, how bout we have a statue that moves whenever it’s offscreen and kills you when you’re turned away. Given that the survivor is never turned away from anything, it seems dumb…
Screw that actually. That’s a shitty power, practically a one trick mary-sue enemy.[/quote]
Now that one I know is an SCP. 
(SCP-689 or SCP-173, depending how you want to interpret your comment)
I say we need SCP-066. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZZjaPQ_qak
…Eric?
How did I forget about this. I’m gonna go do this now. Minus changing the game. I don’t feel like doing that.
Randomly Going Through The Forest (Either Normal Or “Thick”) You May Encounter a Totem Poll url=http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-1579[/url]. When Touching Said Totem Poll, It Will Display Anomalous Effects To The Person Who Touched it. Those Anomalous Effects (Are) [REDACTED].
Addendum: What Do You Think About This SCP? Personally, It’s One Of The “Interesting Ones” Of The SCPs in The Foundation.
Needs moar 682.
so basically a shoggoth that can tear through concrete walls with impunity and tear you to shreds…
And 999 will not save you.
Mean disco robots.
“COME ON, GET DOWN. DO IT NOW. SHAKE YOUR GROOVE THING.”
Hacked dance robots are dangerous. Either you lay down some sick moves to soothe their eternal lust for disco improvement or they rip you to shreds for wasting their time.
They’ve studied all the arts of dancing. There’s no point in even trying to fight them as they’re way faster and more nimble than you. People say they’ve seen them outdance explosions.
There is no escape. You must boogie.
And if you tell them that disco’s dead, they’ll get enraged unless you can provide evidence that disco is indeed dead. If you do provide evidence, they self-destruct. Either way there’s good odds that you’ll be deader than disco.
They must never know. Shit could get nuclear.
Add a zombified Disco Dan. If the Discobot encounters one, hilarity ensues.
What if your characters well versed in the ancheint art of anti-fun-foo… would you then be able to defeat the disco bots.
Sounds Fun.
Also, someone’s PR presented an idea that I wish I’d thought of sooner: pipe SMGs. I can only assume that shitloads of rubberbands would be the Cataclysm survivor’s approach to making a pipe gun autoloading. :V
Weird toys for otakus to collect. Useful for learning new and exciting cosplay costumes.
Laser Fun Sex Avengers! (69 figurine set)
A bunch of… well endowed toy figurines.
So, I’ve just been told that pipe SMGs actually DID used to be a thing. Please, someone tell me that they didn’t use the same materials as the pipe rifles…