Thou doest not even lift

Its not funny or original but i have carved adam and eve on the combat knifes i carry then kain on my redhawk, abel on my scar-l and my car is called eden.

DESMOND!!!

On a pipe bomb:
‘The Mysterious Ticking Noise’

“Look Ma, I’m a lumberjack!” - Chainsaw

“For the Land of The Rising Sun!” - Diamond/Katana

“Return to sender, I dare you.” - Javelins/Throwing knives/etc.

“it throws flames” on flamethower
"it guns machines" on m2 browning machine gun

THIS IS MY FLAMMENWERFER, IS WERFS FLAMMEN!

I love that meme.

“I am the alpha and omega” on a giant fucking steel drum of clean water. I will lift it anyway.

Not really creative, but I carved “michelle” onto a mossberg once.
On a vaguely more creative note, I carved “potshot” onto a 12 gauge pistol.

Haha dang I should just list my fallout weapon names here, it’d work.

I got:

“Rooty-tooty point-and-shooty” on whatever shitty pistol I can find that takes really cheap/available ammo, intended to fire without worrying about ammo count.

“silence is golden” on a well-kept, silenced pistol for those moments I need to shoot and not attract the whole city.

“my perspective” on any scoped rifle, because from my perspective, you’re getting a bullet in the head.

And lastly, “Step two: panic” on a sawed-off shotgun with something sharp stuck on the business end.

“Dwarf Weapon” on my Rivtech Short Shotgun, extends to the 100 or so explosive rounds for it.

“Gorillion folds, can cut through anything” on a Rising Sun katana.

After trying out a chainsaw lajatang using ninjutsu on a shoggoth without using hydraulic muscles,

Carving in “regenerate from this one, fool” seems rather apt.

“My Boomstick” on a shotgun. Preferably a double barrel.

I rarely engrave anything, but I couldn’t resist:

Shining armour’s piercing ring - carved on a set of basic power armor
Use your shield and use your head - carved on a basic power armor helmet

Top quality shitpost, friend.

That being said, I renamed my longsword the ‘Ye Olde Hither Comer’, with the engraving ‘FOR AGATHA’ on it.

Renamed my crappiest bullet-wastey gun “lead dispenser”.

After realizing you can now properly name items (!!!) I did some justice for my sheriff-themed endgame character:

Renamed my longsword to The Sheriff’s Longsword. (Anyone got a better name for it?)

Renamed my Rivtech double barrel loaded with explosive rounds The Sheriff’s Hammer.

Renamed my Rivtech revolver The Sheriff’s Peacemaker.

Renamed my thunder gauntlets to slappers of a word you can’t say on these forums, I don’t want to start this shit again.

Still trying to come up with a good name for my Rivtech slug shotgun… did I mention I really like Rivtech?

“I am the Master of my Fate” on my primary weapon, the rapier.
“I am the Captain of my soul” on the mininuke I’m saving for that day I won’t get to run away.
“Clover” on my Fire Axe. +420 blaze points from Mr. Skeltal if you got that one.
“Use the pointy end” on my old steel spear.
“Subtlety” on my Sledgehammer.
“Paingineer” on my Toolbox.
“Shakalaka” on my shotgun.
“CHEESE. PETRIL.” on my FoodCo Kitchen Buddy.

Diplomacy - tazer
Long distance communication - M27 IAR
Getting to know you better - hunting knife

Valiant Heart - Shovel (+1 indie point if you get the reference)
I love the smell of napalm in the morning - 40mm launcher with napalm shell
No more room in hell - Mosin with sword bayonet
THIS TOOK ME F***IN FOREVER TO MAKE THIS! - Diamond Zweihander

“This machine kills fascists”, carved onto my acoustic guitar.