Cataclysm Moments: The best, the worst, the funniest!

–This thread is meant to be used to tell the stories of their character’s in all matter of cases! (Although ideally not boring ones) There is plenty to talk about, whether you made an awesome escape, survived a lethal situation, or just did something stupid, albeit amusing. Here is a couple of mine:

– “Aw crap, how’d I run into this guy again?” I think as I once again get found by an NPC that has seemingly stalked me for ages. Who also has a shotgun. I had been injured in a recent fight and there was no way I count simple ‘run away.’ Then I had a possibly terrible idea. “YOU SHALL BURN BY RIGHTEOUS FIRE, VILE FIEND!” I yelled as I lobbed several Molotov cocktails in his general direction. We were in a forest, you see, and soon it lit up in a glorious flame of vengeance. I’m going to say he probably died, but he face-tanked two wasps and several of my arrows. If nothing else, it looked amazing.

– I was ridding my Chem-Cycle at night (Basically a motorcycle with a built in chemistry lab), and then I ended up running into a mini-horde of zombie brutes. I had a headlight, thus I could see them early, but they were far to spread out and I was going way to fast to turn in time. So I simply drove straight in while throwing grenades at them. I ended up flying out of my seat right over the entire horde (Which hurt), but I was alive. Then they started coming after me again do to the sun just barely starting to rise. I had enough time to run into the town I was heading to in the first place before they caught up to me. Being brutes, they just smashed through the building I went through. Which promptly collapsed on them. Somehow almost all of them had survived, so I headed toward a car with gas and enough wheel. Apparently the engine was faulty, however. Instead, due to them being so weakened, I decided to just face tank them and repeated punch them with my fists. Good thing I had good martial arts skill, I just barely manged to survive them. Then a wasp took the opportunity to ambush me while I was trying to use a first aid kit. So after that whole epic fight I ended up dying by scalawag tactics.

Found triffids for the first time and lit a fire and as i tried to run away with my cart. As i was running i got trapped in my another triffid queen and my cart got destroyed throwing my loot all over the place.

Seeing the fire rapidly approaching i did a little mental maths and found i could get my important stuff before the fire caught me. I get my few important items with the fire 3 spaces from me as i turn to run. As i take my first step away i die to a series of small explosions… turns out ammo will explode when exposed to fire

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Something along the lines of a year or two ago in game I had found a mansion a pretty well stocked library (a lot of skill books and most were ones I haven’t read yet) so I set up temporarily in the mansion to read all the books making sure the location was secure and that it was unlikely any zombies would try to bash the place down. Now while reading I kept getting interrupted by various crashing noises of which I knew there were both zombies and fungaloids outside the mansion and I just wrote it off as one of the two groups breaking one of the broken down cars outside for no appearant reason again (seriously why) anyways it wears annoying to the point where I made a pair of noise canceling headgear and put that on so I could read in peace of which after that about an hour or two of reading later I noticed the ceiling and one of the walls of the room I held up in collapse into rubble and thought “OH COME ON! I WASN’T MAKING ANY NOISE!” Only thing though was it wasn’t zombies that broke down the wall it was a fire of which I had no idea how it started but long story short I tried to run roof collapsed and the fire caught up and burned me. I cheated my way out but all the stuff I gathered got destroyed so I decided to go down in a blaze of glory and fought the fungaloids of which there were a lot of with a spawned m249 (this was before we could “aim” our guns). The end to yet another relatively early run.

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Well, not to bring up something I already complained about extensively, but there was that time I set a bush on fire and ended up accidentally torching the superstore I was trying to loot. That was . . . funny?

When the fire rebalance gets merged we should hopefully see less “accidental” torching of buildings.

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–If you’re gonna die, it might as well be in a blaze of glory. Possibly shouting some sort of Orcish war-cry or something of the sort as well.

Years back I was trying to blow up the door to a bank vault. Stood next to the door, armed my c4, ran outside the bank, exploded. Doh!

Another one more recently, new char running around the sewers to survive the 10x hp, 10x damage zombies I was playing with, left the sewer and ended up right beside a hulk who promptly punted me through the wall of a building, and I happened to land right beside a tankbot that was apparently trying to pick up some food. It was not amused and I went boom.

About 30ish spawns in same room as a turret/chickenbot/tankbot before the game made sure the starting room was safe.

Had one character get cornered by a shocker earlygame, had nothing left that I could kill it with without killing myself via pain. Surprise mi-go out of nowhere gave me enough time to find a car to run them over.

Let me retell THE GREAT ANT WAR.

Young Queen Ants lay and tend to eggs. These eggs eventually hatch into one of several kinds of Giant Ant, such as worker, forager, or soldier. They can even hatch into new Young Queen Ants, which will then produce their own eggs.

Naturally, if the Queen Ant is not quickly killed, this will have a cascading growth effect.

Martial Combat didn’t work. Not only would the ants not try to fight me, but ants are like Emus; the flee in packs at the sight of danger. I needed a method of killing many of them quickly.

With it’s piddling damage, Chain Lightning didn’t work. So I tried the BFG-2041 from PK’s mod. Worked pretty well, because it was essentially chain lightning with C4 level strength. I had plenty of BFG shells, so it couldn’t hurt to try, right?

Except that the explosion from the BFG rips holes in reality. And I was spamming it into dense hordes of Giant Ants.

So after that, there were dozens of tears in reality CONSTANTLY spewing forth Nether Creatures. I, a powerful mutant, had just torn open numerous holes in reality. Trying to kill FUCKING ANTS.

So after that, I donned my Heavy Power Armor and decided to enact another solution. A final solution. See, I realized I didn’t need to kill all of the ants. No, it was far more simple. I simply needed to kill all of the Young Queen Ants. And then their days were limited. They’d die one by one to the Nether Creatures or to me, or simply flee to die later.

I ruthlessly hunted down every single Young Queen Ant and murdered each and every one of those six-legged bitches like the Chimera I was built to be. I didn’t get them all, but I got enough that none of them were ever in the reality bubble and the infestion…no, the infection, was stopped.

Those holes in reality and the many, many chunks of chitin are my trophy. And whenever I see ants, the first thing I do is kill the queen. Every time. I hate them. I hate them all.

TL;DR This, except with Giant Ants

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Recently a relatively new character blew up due to attempting to fill up a bottle of water from a toilet which apparently had a landmine in it… I was counting on my high perception to avoid traps, but a landmine IN YOUR TOILET?! Who does that sort of thing? Evidently the survivors that owned that became pretty dang paranoid before they inevitably ended up dying.

Got a random car to night raid a city coz my Wasteroller was too big. Went around to park close to a gas station and pulled the handbreak at 32kmh. The car skid, hit a gas pump and it blew away. At 32kmh.
I survived but few times did I shit myself so much in this game, I had 10 in driving btw.

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–An NPC claimed my house belong to him. I quickly whacked him in the head with my nail bat and then proceeded to kite him in such a way so that he was forced to fight a shocker brute that kept patrolling a place I wanted to loot. I totally would have fought the NPC right away, but apparently he seemed to have super good martial arts skills, but plan B ended up better anyway. While the fight was going on I thematically ate some popcorn and watched the bloody brawl. To my surprise, the NPC actually won. So I threw a grenade at him.

Started a new game as a SWAT CQB specialist in a burning building next to a mall by a National Guard camp. I figured Officer Dan was not long for this world, but the starting NPC was friendly. She was also a post threshold raptor mutant martial artist.

The next couple of hours were Dan tagging along as the mutant murdered everything. I got bored after a bit but the carnage was incredible.


Congratulations on your big win! Here’s your trophy! [click] [toss] KABOOOM!

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Some of the things I’ve wound up doing:

  • Ran my SUV off the road outside a mansion, stranding myself there and forcing my character to re-enact Resident Evil 1 for a few days
  • Struggled to drag an old character’s corpse back to my hideout to give them a proper burial with Z9s nipping at my heels
  • Muay Thai’d woodland critters for food
  • Accidentally set up spawn and blacklist settings to create a world with no zombies or monsters at all. God that was eerie.

–Yup, basically. But thanks not to say I wasn’t incredibly impressed by him. He dodged that super punch that brutes do initially! Oh, sure, he was worse for wear at the end, but his fists really hurt that brute. Probably the only reason he didn’t survive was due to stacking pain. If I could have recruited him, that would have been insanely awesome! I would slowly train to be a total boss from him!

Started as a bionic prepper at a camp. There was a town nearby, but the zombie hordes were swarming, so he stole a bicycle and started riding up to the next town. Halfway there, he spotted a pair of gracken and dead soldiers - but also a mi-go that he didn’t think he could handle.

Mi-go are faster than a survivor on foot, but not than one on a bike. He kited the mi-go back into town, and spent thirty minutes riding in loops to dodge the mi-go and the zombies until they started killing each other. By the time the migo got swarmed by a horde, it had cleared out enough zombies that my survivor was able to loot a grocery store, a subway, and two homes.

For a while there, I was seriously considering giving the migo a name and making it my pet, or at least a mascot. Though migos can probably work their way through any defenses a starting survivor can put up so sleeping would have been hard.


More fun with mi-gos:

Latest survivor was heading toward a road on day one, hoping to find some wheels. Instead, he found 3(!) mi-gos, all gutting some poor zombie. My survivor fell back, tried to work his way around them, but there weren’t many good movement options. He did spot a minefield, though.

My survivor proceeded to maneuver so the minefield was between him and the mi-gos, then moved up into their line of sight. They merrily charged into the minefield and then stopped - I guess mi-gos can detect adjacent mines and refuse to move on them, but aren’t smart enough to back up and repath. So my survivor took the collection of rocks he had and started tossing rocks near the mi-gos. After the fifth rock, he connected with a mine and took out two of the bastards.

Sadly, the third mi-go was out of the blast radius, and the fourth one that he hadn’t seen previously was attracted by all the noise. The third one managed to find a path out of the minefield while the survivor was collecting more throwables.

Still, I am glad to be learning ever more ways of killing mi-gos.