Infinite procrastination: you can't get there from here

So, I want to raid a military base which is literally right beside the shelter where I spawned, but so far this game I haven’t run across an electrohack or a military ID card. I’ve got my fire station fortress all set up and well-stocked, and I finally decide it’s time to go explore that base. Hmm, no explosives. I know, I’ll use some ammo I have laying around!

Let’s see, I should probably get at least one point of throwing skill so I can toss the ammo on a fire near the door. I have a pitching text in my bookcase, I’ll just settle down for a few hours and read it.

Oops, I’m thirsty. Let’s go check the funnels and bottles. Ooh, goody, they’re full. Hmm, I should really build a wooden barrel to hold all this water, since the toilet where I store my water isn’t within crafting distance of my fireplace.

Get my axe, head out to the nearest house, chop down a tree in the backyard, convert it all to 2x4s, load up my shopping cart, and make a half-dozen round trips to get it all back to my base. Done and done!

Build my barrel, fill it with water, replace all my bottles and jugs under their funnels. Now I am ready to read my pitching book.

Begin reading. Four percent. YOU FEEL TIRED.

Okay, time for bed. Sleep the sleep of the just. Get up, eat, drink, WTF is all that noise outside?

Go outside, it looks like a fucking petting zoo. I guess running back and forth getting all that firewood really left a scent trail. Okay, out comes the machete, murder all the assorted flies, cats, spiders, foxes, turkeys, dogs, mooses, wolves, zombie dogs, deer, shrews, bats, and so forth milling around in my front yard. Butcher, skin, collect empties.

Let’s see, I have about 80 or 90 meat. Seems a shame to let it go to waste. Okay, out comes the smoker and dehydrator. Cue Apocalyse Kitchen theme song. On todays episode we make sausages, balogna, currywurst, jerky, cheeseburgers, and enough dried meat to choke Bear Grylls. Done.

Now, let’s settle back with some opossum jerky and read that pitching book.


Dammit, okay, I don’t want to waste the firewood or I’ll have another petting zoo to deal with tomorrow. I’ll just make myself a light strip here and… dammit, no electronic scrap.

Grab the machete, grab the cart, time to go shopping through dead people’s homes for a talking doll or a computer. Fight my way through the previous tenants, murder a basketball court full of children (and eat all their cookies to make myself feel better about it), find a computer in the sixth house I raid, deconstruct the computer, and grab the electronic scrap. Finally.

Return home, make my light strip, switch it on, lean back with a sigh and open my pitching text.


God fucking damn it.

Okay, bed time. Tomorrow FOR SURE. I set my alarm to make sure I’m up bright and early so I can read my book and still have enough light left to hike to the military base. Thunder and lightning all night, but I’m safe and warm in my snuggie. Wake up, eat some fly meat sausages, and crack open the pitching text. FINALLY. Spend the morning learning how to toss shit. Close my book, gird my loins, heft my machete, grab my cart, and off I go to raid the military base! I throw open the front door and…

It’s fucking pissing down acid.

Four days and counting since I first decided it was time to hit that base. Does this happen to anyone else, where it takes you a week to get anything done?


No, this never happens to me. I’m too pro, and I’m able to get a reflex recurve bow on day one by luck of the RNG.

Dem feels bro.

Yeah, except in my case it’s less “four days to get around to going to that military base” and more “four days to get around to going to the next block over because sometimes when I play this game I become an obsessive hoarder and store every single thing I find and spent over half an hour gathering car parts from five cars and rebar from a burnt house and organizing it in my shelter when my actual goal was to get a new book from the library two streets down”.

So I feel your pain.

More like
"Spend seven days trying to find a goddamn mini nuke I’m fucking certain 100% is in my stockpile. Then find out its in the vehicle. Then go to the fungal spire and nuke shit."

Advanced inventory management can be opened with /

“Hmm, I’ll just fix the car before I take it out.”

Ten hours later, wired on Adderall and caked in the drying blood of zombie children and their enormous dogs (why are there no Zombie Toy Poodles?) - “Ah, at last, a 17” wheel! Now to install it. Although, I feel… sort of… TIRED."

“Ah well, I’ll do it in the morning; I’m sure no untimely tragedy will befall me between now and then.”

[It does.]

Every. Goddamn. Time.


great read and the feeling is mutual,

I used to avoid raiding in the rain out of worry my character was going to get sick. That ended up delaying my plans so often it drove me crazy. I carry around a towel now, keep a rain hood, and pop a bunch of vitamins while I run around soaked now.

i know your fell i too colect every thing

I’m new here, but this made me feel like I’m not new here.

Thanks, I feel like I’m validated in more ways than a paid shrink could validate me.

This applies in real life too.
Want a computer? Need cash.
Need cash? Get a job.
Want a job? Get a college education.
Get a college education? Get some cash.

And thus, a lesson on vicious circles.

The ‘too dark to read/craft’ thing always gets me. Because either it’s too late or its f***cking raining.

Oil lamps can really save the day, I usually craft tallow from fat chunks and then lamp oil from it.

Since outside it’s full of annoying fat-providers to butcher, I never run out of lamp fuel.

lamp oil can be used to craft molotovs if there’s no booze around.

I need all the fat that I can muster for sausages and the like, and tallow is a precious precious resource. Lightstrips can work though, or read by the light of a burning apartment building…

Just get your survival high. At level 8, you can get fat from dogs.

Since outside it's full of annoying fat-providers to butcher, I never run out of lamp fuel.

Heh, fat-providers :smiley:

Some of you guys need to learn how to stop looting…

Why? I mean everything can be used in one way or another. Like the armchair I dragged four map tiles to my house so I could sleep on something other then the floor.

Yeah, but there’s tomorrow.

(Though, I once dragged a stove from a place to by base, but that was when it was clear.)