More joke monsters (with ideas)

How about adding more joke or, should i say, easter egg monsters?I’ve come up with 2 end-game strong monsters:

  1. Usyless - end-game mob, inhabits ONLY missile silo, a dangerous and mad human wielding the best submachine gun in the game OR a unique bashing melee weapon called “flag pole”, wears a gas mask, can regenerate HP and use manhacks/surrounded by drones, description should say something like: “He is looking at you with disappointment and hate at the same time, something tells you that he was waiting for you in this place for a very long time to gain vengeance, but you don’t even know him…”.

  2. Mesisne - end-game mob, may inhabit labs OR military outposts, a dangerous humanoid mutant using two tentacles/claws (giving it an ability to attack player from higher distance just like hollow zombies), cannot regenerate HP but has crazy amounts of health and an ability to stun player, description should say something like: “Horrible result of experiments done by the government in an attempt to make a super-soldier that is capable of completing even the most dangerous tasks and be a true one-man army, it looks at you with aggression”.

If you have not figured it out yet, the first mob is a reference to Ulysses from Fallout New Vegas lonesome road DLC and second is Nemesis from Resident Evil series.
Now come up with your own ideas!

Ulysses could be fun. Once you show up he says something along the lines of “I’ve been waiting for you Courier 6!” and you have the option of telling him “Nah man, I’m a [insert survivor’s scenario job here]. You got the wrong guy.” and then he just apologizes and asks you to leave. Unless you’re a mailman, in which case he goes hostile.


How about the $h!t Flinger zombie?(not poop…but I’d laugh myself silly to have pissing and pooping in game)

He was gutted and his guts began to rot and harden. This twisted monstrousity now pulls out his own guts and hurls toxic poisonous gas bombs at you. Exploding in 3-5 tile pops! A small amount of damage and you get poisoned by the gas.

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I’m not sure what they’d be named, but headcrabs and headcrab zombies could be joke monsters maybe? Call them “Vagina spiders” in honor of Hunt Down The Freeman. The headcrabs would exclusively target your head, making leaping attacks. The zombies would, well, be zombies. If you don’t get a headshot kill, the headcrab jumps off the dead body.

Ulysses and Mesisne both sound hilarious.

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“What are you afraid of?”
“Spiders. And women. And spider-women.”

Something like that is a quote from Dog Soldiers (great werewolf movie) and is what ‘vagina spiders’ made me think of.

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What about:

  • A flaming skeleton biker with a broken motorcycle nearby (ghost rider) that lights you on fire with a flame whip
  • A skeleton rolling in a wheel (dark souls) that does bashing leap attacks
  • A netherworld mutant with sawed off horns (hell boy) that shoots you with a big pistol or bashes you with oversized fists
  • A humanoid robot from the future (terminator) with powerful weapons
  • A house garden with deadly plants and way too many lawnmowers ( plants vs. zombies)
  • A house filled with traps, one child zombie, and two or three dead robbers (home alone)

Just a few ideas that could be more fleshed out.

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What about a perfectly normal chicken but with the Jabberwocky’s fear attack? The one where it screams and paralyses you with fear.

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Chicken ideas(because why not?):

  • chicken walker chicken > chicken with mini chicken walker armourments
  • basilisk > chicken with a snake headed tail with a paralytic gaze
  • cyborg chicken > smart chicken with laser beam eye (robot chicken ref maybe?)
  • fried chicken > somehow it lived through being deep fried. Could be a decent meal if it wasn’t moving

That’s all the chicken stuff I could think of


Why not Have a guy that looks like a super hero residing in the basement of a very big mansion with a lot of guys wearing “Laser swords” (Don’t deal enough damage to kill you instantly) and the basement is a huge “battlefield” littered of other “survivors” corpses then he could say “Huh? Another one comes down… Heh you don’t look so weak so I am gonna be good to you. Now before we get the fight started let’s shake hands for good sportsmanship and honor…” If you shake hands he kills you instantly saying “Killer spark…” and if you don’t he will get mad and attack.

-A big quantity of HP and defense would be a early end-game boss

-And the guy would have very powerful laser or energy related attacks as well as melee attacks and before every attack he will say “Killer” before the name of the attack ex.
Killer Beam!.

-The guy will obviously be called Killer man and its description would be something like this
"He is a man wearing what it looks like a classical super hero suit that makes him look muscular but something about him makes you doubt his intention… Whether it’s the place where he resides or the fact that he does not seem to belong in this world…

-The guy parodies Destroy man from No More Heroes. I dunno why but most bosses from that game fit in a post apocalyptic world if you ask me… xD