The massive NPC mood swings does it for me:
“MOVE IT ASSHOLE!”
“Pardon me friend, I’d like to pass.”
“Excuse me, you’re in the way.”
“OUT OF THE WAY, FUCKER.”
“MOVE YOUR ASS, DIPSHIT!”
My sister on her period has nothing on these guys.
Me: "Could I please have that lighter, sir?"
NPC: "NO FUCKING WAY! FUCKING COCKSUCKER, FUCKING DICKHEAD!"
Me: "Please… I’m going to die of an infected wound and it needs to be cauterized with that lighter…"
NPC: "GO FUCK YOURSELF, ASK ME AGAIN AND YOUR FUCKING DEAD!"
Me: Pleee - Gets shot
NPC’s always be sharing their kindness throughout the world.
“God fucking damnit, this hurts. Hey! Asshole! Help me!”
“Alright. I need some stuff though.”
“Why should I give you anything?”
“Well, I am helping you…”
“FUCK NO, I AIN’T GIVING YOU SHIT.”
“Well then, take this.”
Gunshot
Gunshot
Gunshot
Thud
Gotta love them NPCs.
'specialy when they give you lit dynmite or sit in the corner of your shelter staring at you.
Its both funny and sad to see them suicide-charge a horde wielding a toilet paper roll.
the random vcharector button.
I ended up a woman named charles who had scizophrienia and awe inspiring cooking skills
And a meth additction
The fact that I can carry 600 pounds more than my body was ready for and still be able to walk, slowly, but still walk.
[quote=“Mrnocamera, post:14, topic:6296”]Trying to "c"lose yourself.
“You can’t, some idiot’s in the way!”
"A"ctivating a crowbar on yourself.
“You try to pry open your wallet, but alas, you are too miserly.”[/quote]
You try to hammer youself but…
You can’t touch this.
I was smoking some joint and when I had finished it I saw at the bottom
"Could Jesus microwave a burrito so hot, that he himself couldn’t eat it?"
Im now going to smoke all my joints
i saw a wide tire and its description says
"A wide tire. \o/ This wide." 
Update on silliness in cataclysm. recently in cataclysm when I was getting clean off a deep alcohol addiction, I was hallucinating, when randomly appears, SHIA LABEOUF, when I read the description is said, Lurking in the shadows, living in the woods, killing for sport, eating all the bodies!
Additionally when I was recently smoking a bone, a message appeared that said, Dave’s not here man. LOLS
[quote=“Creamy Goodness, post:30, topic:6296”]Update on silliness in cataclysm. recently in cataclysm when I was getting clean off a deep alcohol addiction, I was hallucinating, when randomly appears, SHIA LABEOUF, when I read the description is said, Lurking in the shadows, living in the woods, killing for sport, eating all the bodies!
Additionally when I was recently smoking a bone, a message appeared that said, Dave’s not here man. LOLS[/quote]
Shia was just a hallucination. That time. 
(Does very good bleed damage.)
That sentence is also one of my funny things about CDDA, its such a diverse game you could be smoking a bone for cooking or smoking it like one might smoke a cigar. You can also find a human cookbook (for cooking humans) in a mansion (rich guy hunting people?) or mutagen in a regional school chem lab (boy genius Jimmy Neutron!).
I guess I find it funny because CDDA straddles the line of reality (by reality I mean being realistic) and in the end it depends on your point of view in life. That sentence reminds me of it, I suppose.
(whoops, drifted from funny to deep, sorry)
try lockpick yourself
“you pick your nose and your sinuses swing open”.
How the hell do you use stuff on yourself?
use any item like crowbar or mop and press 5 to use it on yourself 
waht made mi laugh is that some npc they get anything they see well i was going to blow a wall with dynimite and the NPC takes the active Dynimite and dies but that was wen the gme was really bugi now it wuld never happen
“it’s not a bug it’s a feature”
NPC grabing lit explosivs and diang? i now they get thing but i never thaught they wuld grab a lit dynimite
Actual cannibal Shia Labeouf always brings a smile to my face.
Words to live by