# We make bad suggestions and come up with horrible ideas

**URL:** <https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101>\
**Category:** The Drawing Board\
**Created:** [September 18, 2013, 5:15pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101 "2013-09-18T17:15:24Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 55

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**Author:** ![Caconym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/aca169/32.png) [@Caconym](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Caconym)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 1:04am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1081 "2015-01-21T01:04:16Z")

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> [@Logrin](#):
>
> The description of every object–no matter how mundane–should be sexually charged. How can I possibly expect to be immersed in a game that doesn’t hold up to the erotica of Anaïs Nin?

This a banana. It is a large yellow curved fruit. It has a variety of uses.

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**Author:** ![Hardluck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/f05b48/32.png) [@Hardluck](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Hardluck)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 1:12am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1082 "2015-01-21T01:12:13Z")

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> [@Logrin](#):
>
> The description of every object–no matter how mundane–should be sexually charged. How can I possibly expect to be immersed in a game that doesn’t hold up to the erotica of Anaïs Nin?

Potato.

The memories of things you’ve done with these root vegetables warm you during lonely nights.

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**Author:** ![kevin.granade](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/kevin.granade/32/1316_2.png) [@kevin.granade](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/kevin.granade)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 2:33am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1083 "2015-01-21T02:33:14Z")

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> [@Coolthulhu](#):
>
> [quote=“jcd, post:1079, topic:3101”][quote=“SeigeLion, post:1078, topic:3101”][quote=“Illogical\_Blox, post:1077, topic:3101”][quote=“Logrin, post:1068, topic:3101”]The description of every object–no matter how mundane–should be sexually charged. How can I possibly expect to be immersed in a game that doesn’t hold up to the erotica of Anaïs Nin?

This is some bubble wrap. It’s air-filled balls are large, and squishy. You feel the need to squeeze them.[/quote]  
The long, thick, spear looks impressive. You feel as if you should grasp it firmly and impale your foes upon it.  
10/10 best weapon.[/quote]  
This is a cucumber. A thick, cylindrical vegetable. The enterprising survivor will think of more than one way to use it.[/quote]

This is a vibrator. You could put it in one of your orifices.[/quote]  
Instructions unclear, I think I broke my nose.

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**Author:** ![botherations](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/botherations/32/417_2.png) [@botherations](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/botherations)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 2:40am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1084 "2015-01-21T02:40:10Z")

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End-Game boss fight needs to be Kevin Bacon.

![](http://i.imgur.com/EIUVfoy.jpg)

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**Author:** ![RAM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b9bd4f/32.png) [@RAM](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/RAM)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 3:32am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1085 "2015-01-21T03:32:52Z")

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L.A.S.E.R. designators and orbital bombardment satellites. Shoot something for two thousand ticks and then watch it and the surrounding scenery get obliterated from on high…

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**Author:** ![Catfoodbob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ee59a6/32.png) [@Catfoodbob](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Catfoodbob)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 3:36am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1086 "2015-01-21T03:36:00Z")

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Give flaming eyeballs teleportation, and Beholders

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**Author:** ![Logrin](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/logrin/32/209_2.png) [@Logrin](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Logrin)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 6:28am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1087 "2015-01-21T06:28:11Z")

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All these revised item descriptions are high-larious!

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**Author:** ![RAM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b9bd4f/32.png) [@RAM](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/RAM)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 7:24am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1088 "2015-01-21T07:24:12Z")

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The Emperor’s costume. Very fancy, 0 weight, 0 encumbrance, covers the torso arms and legs for the close(it is perfectly tailored for the snuggest of fits), common(well it is clothes), overcoat(Well it is obviously so fancy that it has layers to it), and belted(ALL of the accoutrements) layers. N.P.C.s hate it though on account of them all being jealous of your fancy duds…

Also, all the Irish people who were infected would have shrunk down to a third of their former size, put on their greenest costumes, started a life of gathering treasures in cast-iron pots, started building nests near colour-scales, and developed the ability to teleport themselves and curse others.

This is an AK-47. Like so many other things, before the cataclysm, doctors rarely believed it when told that someone had rested it against a tree while relieving themselves and accidentally slipped and fell on it. Try activating this item for a happy mood.

This is an M.P.3 player. For a good time: turn it on and make it sing.

This is vodka. While toxic, the filtering processes in the early digestive tract render it safe to consume in respectable volumes. If consumed in such a way that it goes directly to the later elements of the digestive tract, the high alcohol absorption rate can easily be lethal.

This is 's former mother. It is still quite fresh…

This is a Jabberwok corpse. Parts of it are still quite fresh…

This is a floating eye. You wonder if it has a socket…

This is a sock. You can wear it. On your feet…

This is a long rope. Months ago it stated in a hole while you were enjoying your garden. You just spent hours in labour to bring it into the world. Now you are going to lash it and have it carry your load.

This is a playboy magazine. It is strangely sticky. Maybe it fell in some honey.

This is a top gear magazine. It is strangely sticky. Maybe it fell in some honey, you should try licking it off.

This is a guns and ammo…

This is a standpipe manifest…

This is a heavy stick. It is brown and sticky.

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**Author:** ![system](https://us1.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/uploads/cataclysmdda/original/1X/21b5d044e8473b25d0bf905d60477e25f6fbe0cf.png) [@system](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/system)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 7:36am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1089 "2015-01-21T07:36:00Z")

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CDDA shouldn’t be displayed in top down view, rather side scrolling 2d.

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**Author:** ![Slax](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/slax/32/5385_2.png) [@Slax](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Slax)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 1:46pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1090 "2015-01-21T13:46:24Z")

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Crotch Knife  
You’ve replaced your junk with a rather large knife. You will sometimes be able to land an extra melee attack with it. Constantly damages any worn pants.

> [@Logrin](#):
>
> All these revised item descriptions are high-larious!

![](http://i.imgur.com/FcdDz8h.jpg)  
I see what you did there.

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**Author:** ![Catfoodbob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ee59a6/32.png) [@Catfoodbob](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Catfoodbob)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 2:32pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1091 "2015-01-21T14:32:35Z")

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Have the reality bubble encompass the entire map

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**Author:** ![Rhodri](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/rhodri/32/342_2.png) [@Rhodri](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Rhodri)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 4:13pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1092 "2015-01-21T16:13:51Z")

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> [@Catfoodbob](#):
>
> Have the reality bubble encompass the entire map

The fungus would cover the whole world within an in-game week if this happened.

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**Author:** ![RAM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b9bd4f/32.png) [@RAM](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/RAM)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 9:22pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1093 "2015-01-21T21:22:24Z")

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> [@Rhodri](#):
>
> [quote=“Catfoodbob, post:1091, topic:3101”]Have the reality bubble encompass the entire map

The fungus would cover the whole world within an in-game week if this happened.[/quote]By goodness, you are right, this must be taken to a different topic!

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**Author:** ![Caconym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/aca169/32.png) [@Caconym](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Caconym)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 10:34pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1094 "2015-01-21T22:34:16Z")

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> [@Rhodri](#):
>
> [quote=“Catfoodbob, post:1091, topic:3101”]Have the reality bubble encompass the entire map

The fungus would cover the whole world within an in-game week if this happened.[/quote]  
Just as Flame would want it?

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**Author:** ![Flashlight\_Hoarder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Flashlight\_Hoarder](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Flashlight_Hoarder)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 10:35pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1095 "2015-01-21T22:35:49Z")

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Pssh, Everyone with a brain knows that Triffids are superior to the Mycus.

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**Author:** ![TheFlame52](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/theflame52/32/247_2.png) [@TheFlame52](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/TheFlame52)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 10:43pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1096 "2015-01-21T22:43:59Z")

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> [@Flashlight Hoarder](#):
>
> Pssh, Everyone with a brain knows that Triffids are superior to the Mycus.

You…

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**Author:** ![Rhodri](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/rhodri/32/342_2.png) [@Rhodri](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Rhodri)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 11:00pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1097 "2015-01-21T23:00:35Z")

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> [@TheFlame52](#):
>
> [quote=“Flashlight Hoarder, post:1095, topic:3101”]Pssh, Everyone with a brain knows that Triffids are superior to the Mycus.

You…[/quote]  
True. While I don’t like either due to how annoying they are to deal with, at least Triffids have a heart. (get it?)

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**Author:** ![RAM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b9bd4f/32.png) [@RAM](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/RAM)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 11:01pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1098 "2015-01-21T23:01:49Z")

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Ever hear of leafcutter ants? They butcher the triffids and use them to feed their enslaved Mycus. Them for the win!!!

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**Author:** ![Rhodri](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/rhodri/32/342_2.png) [@Rhodri](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Rhodri)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2015, 11:30pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1099 "2015-01-21T23:30:57Z")

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> [@RAM](#):
>
> Ever hear of leafcutter ants? They butcher the triffids and use them to feed their enslaved Mycus. Them for the win!!!

But in Cataclysm, the fungus infects the ants and gives them unbearable pain as it grows throughout its body, not even giving the ants the gift of death. (It would be a mercy kill, reading the fungal ant’s description.)

And that’s why I kill every fungal thing I find.

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**Author:** ![Catfoodbob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ee59a6/32.png) [@Catfoodbob](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Catfoodbob)\
**Post date:** [January 22, 2015, 3:09am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/we-make-bad-suggestions-and-come-up-with-horrible-ideas/3101/1100 "2015-01-22T03:09:06Z")

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Cyborg ants, ants with Two fusion blaster arms and 4 joint tortions

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