# Joke weapons for fun

**URL:** <https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603>\
**Category:** The Drawing Board\
**Created:** [January 30, 2019, 4:02am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603 "2019-01-30T04:02:46Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Umbra.Animo](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/umbra.animo/32/3258_2.png) [@Umbra.Animo](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Umbra.Animo)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 4:02am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/1 "2019-01-30T04:02:46Z")

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So joke weapons are mostly silly weapons that somehow work and may work well, but still look so silly. think dead rising level of weird note would still work they just look like they shouldn’t. and yes this is a idea board

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**Author:** ![Medi\_Ding](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/medi_ding/32/5091_2.png) [@Medi\_Ding](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Medi_Ding)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 6:28am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/2 "2019-01-30T06:28:34Z")

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Grenades, when activated, will turn into 2 items, the pin and the grenade itself. Throwing the pin will create a mininuke explosion on impact, and throwing the grenade will… uh… do nothing I guess?

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**Author:** ![KiBoy](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/kiboy/32/5863_2.png) [@KiBoy](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/KiBoy)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 8:21am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/3 "2019-01-30T08:21:23Z")

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Nothing is stopping you from using that ++Vibrator in combat…

As for something different… Maybe a piko hammer? You know, the one which makes squishy noises. Very low bash damage, but might give you a slight morale boost during combat.

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**Author:** ![Invalid\_Username](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/4bbf92/32.png) [@Invalid\_Username](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Invalid_Username)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 10:51am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/4 "2019-01-30T10:51:56Z")

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Excalipoor needs to be in there somewhere. You think it’s a ++ dikoted vorpal sword you randomly found next to a lake… until you hit something powerful with it.

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**Author:** ![Damnit-Jenkins](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/damnit-jenkins/32/4323_2.png) [@Damnit-Jenkins](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Damnit-Jenkins)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 11:35am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/5 "2019-01-30T11:35:23Z")

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> [@Invalid\_Username](#):
>
> Excalipoor needs to be in there somewhere. You think it’s a ++ dikoted vorpal sword you randomly found next to a lake… until you hit something powerful with it.

I read “Excalipoor” and immediately pictured a 2xsword with sheet metal bent around it, nailed in place, and sharpened. Leather wrapped handle with something shiny on the pommel.

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**Author:** ![TheZoneWizard](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/thezonewizard/32/1397_2.png) [@TheZoneWizard](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/TheZoneWizard)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 1:42pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/6 "2019-01-30T13:42:01Z")

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I would like to see a “Special Umbrella” to shove up an enemies ass to open it via motorized mechanism.

…then again it was based upon a joke I heard in a movie I cannot remember. But upon thinking about it…that would be pretty fu\*\*ed up to use that on anyone/thing. \>\_\>

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**Author:** ![Litppunk](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/litppunk/32/409_2.png) [@Litppunk](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Litppunk)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 1:59pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/7 "2019-01-30T13:59:50Z")

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So, sort of like Granades, or more like chainsaw naginata?

Hmm oh I see this is beciming the we come up with terrible ideas: weapons edition.

Manhole discus.

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**Author:** ![Medi\_Ding](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/medi_ding/32/5091_2.png) [@Medi\_Ding](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Medi_Ding)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 5:14pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/8 "2019-01-30T17:14:12Z")

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Excaliper. A caliper with minor decorations to make it look a bit like a sword. You can use it in crafting, though.

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**Author:** ![Lazy\_lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f475e1/32.png) [@Lazy\_lizard](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Lazy_lizard)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 6:29pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/9 "2019-01-30T18:29:38Z")

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Giant green rubber boxing-gloves.

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**Author:** ![Mantar](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/mantar/32/42_2.png) [@Mantar](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Mantar)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 6:53pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/10 "2019-01-30T18:53:56Z")

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Excalibat. A legendary baseball bat cloaked in a magical glow. It not only hits like a truck, but you can use it to launch baseballs at enemies, which will explode on contact.

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**Author:** ![DeWolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/df705f/32.png) [@DeWolf](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/DeWolf)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 8:04pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/11 "2019-01-30T20:04:09Z")

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A pistol that shoots knives.

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**Author:** ![psyxypher](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/psyxypher/32/11778_2.png) [@psyxypher](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/psyxypher)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 8:23pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/12 "2019-01-30T20:23:11Z")

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ELECTROMAGNETIC NERF BATS! Derived from Rivtech’s Combat Armor technology.

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**Author:** ![TheMurderUnicorn](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/themurderunicorn/32/5706_2.png) [@TheMurderUnicorn](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/TheMurderUnicorn)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 8:49pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/13 "2019-01-30T20:49:39Z")

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I’m sure this isn’t doable . . . But back when we played Gears of War, we joked that the Boltok (the magnum-esque pistol) was so powerful that it actually fired smaller caliber pistols instead of bullets

o\_o So, that.

A big gun that uses lesser guns for ammunition.

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**Author:** ![redxlaser15](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/redxlaser15/32/1573_2.png) [@redxlaser15](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/redxlaser15)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2019, 9:57pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/14 "2019-01-30T21:57:00Z")

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Ever play Streets of Rogue? That game has a water pistol in it. If you don’t know what the contents of a certain syringe does, just pour it into the gun and it’s effects wilkaboy to any creature it hits.  
My favorite is when you put cyanide pills in it, since apparently anything that touches/breathes that stuff immediately explodes into tiny giblets.  
I nominate this idea.

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**Author:** ![TheZoneWizard](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/thezonewizard/32/1397_2.png) [@TheZoneWizard](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/TheZoneWizard)\
**Post date:** [January 31, 2019, 1:01am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/15 "2019-01-31T01:01:17Z")

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Find dog. Train dog as companion. Alter dog to shoot killer bee’s out dog mouth(bionics) and for maximum effect. Add a looped soundtrack of Jingle Bells like a klaxon for scaring the crap out of victims!

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**Author:** ![Mantar](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/mantar/32/42_2.png) [@Mantar](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Mantar)\
**Post date:** [January 31, 2019, 2:10am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/16 "2019-01-31T02:10:02Z")

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> [@TheZoneWizard](#):
>
> a looped soundtrack of Jingle Bells

Surely you mean this one:

[![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xam01uaj6Vg/hqdefault.jpg?sqp=-oaymwEmCOADEOgC8quKqQMa8AEB-AH-BIAC4AOKAgwIABABGC8gZSg2MA8=&rs=AOn4CLBAw4973ju2_mYkwbqmpbGd5yaSTA "Barking Dogs - Jingle Bells") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xam01uaj6Vg)

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**Author:** ![redxlaser15](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/redxlaser15/32/1573_2.png) [@redxlaser15](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/redxlaser15)\
**Post date:** [January 31, 2019, 3:11am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/17 "2019-01-31T03:11:55Z")

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Perhaps we could have a special knife named Murder that has a mini boombox attached to the hilt that plays ‘It’s beginning to look a lot like murder’ every time it gets coated in blood.

EDIT: I learned of this song on the ‘kid’s game’ ROBLOX while jumping of a cliff in-game for the purpose of collecting insurance money.

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**Author:** ![TheMurderUnicorn](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/themurderunicorn/32/5706_2.png) [@TheMurderUnicorn](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/TheMurderUnicorn)\
**Post date:** [January 31, 2019, 3:18am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/18 "2019-01-31T03:18:02Z")

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If there’s ever a ‘Murder’ in game, it’d better be a unicorn.

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**Author:** ![Umbra.Animo](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/umbra.animo/32/3258_2.png) [@Umbra.Animo](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Umbra.Animo)\
**Post date:** [January 31, 2019, 3:19am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/19 "2019-01-31T03:19:29Z")

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hmmm what about Joke mutations. mostly funny but still workable mutations like unicron version of a horse mutation

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![redxlaser15](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/redxlaser15/32/1573_2.png) [@redxlaser15](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/redxlaser15)\
**Post date:** [January 31, 2019, 3:19am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/joke-weapons-for-fun/18603/20 "2019-01-31T03:19:55Z")

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Maybe we should add pocket mangonels too.  
That sounds fun. It’d be more of a bludgoning weapon due to its since rather than a ranged one though

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