# Epitaph to an NPC

**URL:** <https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986>\
**Category:** The Bunker\
**Created:** [June 3, 2016, 11:44pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986 "2016-06-03T23:44:36Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![pisskop](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/pisskop/32/1327_2.png) [@pisskop](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/pisskop)\
**Post date:** [June 3, 2016, 11:44pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/1 "2016-06-03T23:44:36Z")

</div>

Here lies Darius Knapp

Torn to pieces by a wolf who jumped over a guard rail at the apartment complex.

I came out of the building to see it nomming your throat.

??? - Spring, day 4

---

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**Author:** ![Rivet](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/rivet/32/11_2.png) [@Rivet](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Rivet)\
**Post date:** [June 3, 2016, 11:56pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/2 "2016-06-03T23:56:20Z")

</div>

Here lies (some of) Shane Milton,

Devoured by the ever-hungry @,

He was delicious.

Summer, Day 64

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![MrQwerty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2acd7d/32.png) [@MrQwerty](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/MrQwerty)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 10:52am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/3 "2016-06-04T10:52:38Z")

</div>

Here lies a guy whose name i didn’t bother memorising.  
Suddenly died for no apparent reason.  
Your meat shall give me sustenance.  
Spring day 3

---

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**Author:** ![Alasnuyo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Alasnuyo](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Alasnuyo)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 11:37am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/4 "2016-06-04T11:37:32Z")

</div>

Here lies Gertha Gunn,

Yet another asshole.

Your shotgun is no match for my RV.

Year 1, Day 62 of Spring.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Rot](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/rot/32/454_2.png) [@Rot](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Rot)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 5:17pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/5 "2016-06-04T17:17:34Z")

</div>

Here lies Comrade Garry

He died from trying to eat a lighter.

Thank you for teaching me all your overpowered skills.  
You will be missed.

Winter, Day 277

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![COS\_Cecillian](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/cos_cecillian/32/485_2.png) [@COS\_Cecillian](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/COS_Cecillian)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 7:14pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/6 "2016-06-04T19:14:32Z")

</div>

Here lies Faustino Kelley

He died as he lived, surrounded by zombies

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![BeerBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c67d28/32.png) [@BeerBeer](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/BeerBeer)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 7:59pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/7 "2016-06-04T19:59:03Z")

</div>

Here lies John Doe, the refugee center trader.

Due to the peculiar map generation, a quarter of the building lacked walls, exposing John’s booth corner to a large swamp and its inhabitants. John fought bravely, killing several creatures until he finally succumbed to a wolf, of all things. You fought well, John. You fought well.

* * *

Here lies John Doe, a bandit.

Killed with a gun and ammo that was looted from his own encampment by a desperate but slick survivor.

* * *

Here lies John Doe, a biker infiltrator.

Killed by his provocable temper. His .22cal semi-auto peashooter and “comical ball” ammo were no match to a .45cal burst from a Vector SMG.

* * *

Here lies John Doe, the ranch foreman.

Killed by the choices he made regarding the location of the ranch, which resided almost next to a slime pit. John killed many slimes but not enough.

* * *

Here lies Jane Doe, and her two friends. All bandits.

Killed by a swarm of pissed off ants that were lured to their direction by a survivor with a noisy modified RV, decorated with some ant guts moments prior.

---

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**Author:** ![Burnt\_Earth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9fc348/32.png) [@Burnt\_Earth](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Burnt_Earth)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 8:18pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/8 "2016-06-04T20:18:45Z")

</div>

Alphai, Female NPC type, you survived so long before we met, but you had a flamethrower, you burnt down everything you saw.

You were always talking about seeing the stars and bars flying proud again, but it was clear to you the zombie threat, the squirrels and zombies alike you lit ablaze more than the flag ever did in any hippie rally in history. The abandoned cars, the (figuratively) empty houses, the storefronts and streets.

You ran so fast I never caught up, but I saw where you went, but the pools of burning fuel, the zombie corpses, the collapsing homes and exploded cars in the street. The flames that consumed you, may as well have been mine, if I had the fearless contempt for fire like you did. Walk through the fire you did, Alphai.

Godspeed you, Alphai, may you explode and burn down the very walls of hell like you burned down my starting base and all the buildings, cars, zombies, nearby.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Eric](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Eric](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Eric)\
**Post date:** [June 5, 2016, 1:09pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/9 "2016-06-05T13:09:08Z")

</div>

Here lies John Doe, a NPC slave fighter

He attacked me with his bare hands when I got too close to his stash in the middle of the swamp. His stash consisted of a pack of cigarrettes and a pair of sunglasses. Six shots from my USP .45 later and he was no more.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Shadowdweller](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Shadowdweller](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Shadowdweller)\
**Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 6:55am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/10 "2016-06-06T06:55:56Z")

</div>

Here lies Some Guy,

Your rudeness exceeded your weapons  
and the only reason I’m prolly bothering  
to write this is cuz I’m on drugs.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Taberone](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/taberone/32/515_2.png) [@Taberone](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Taberone)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2016, 5:21am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/11 "2016-06-10T05:21:31Z")

</div>

Here lies TonZa,

Seen a bunch of other gals named TonZa but never one like you  
You ran at me from who knows how many yards away just to wave a flamethrower in my face while shouting at me to keep my distance  
Talked you down and made you a follower  
Did your damn fetch quest  
Watched helplessly as you started looting random crap you’ll never use, wasting all the volume you can carry  
Watched helplessly as you suicidally charged at a Zombie Horde without using Hit and Run tactics before going apeshit with the flamethrower, burning down an entire building and then yourself

Didn’t even last more than a couple of days.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Kryxx](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/kryxx/32/438_2.png) [@Kryxx](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Kryxx)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2016, 10:04pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/12 "2016-06-11T22:04:43Z")

</div>

Here likes Jo…

that’s all I heard before you leaped in front of my Humvee going 100mph.  
You had some good stuff, sorry I crushed half of it.

Thanks.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![pisskop](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/pisskop/32/1327_2.png) [@pisskop](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/pisskop)\
**Post date:** [July 27, 2016, 1:45am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/13 "2016-07-27T01:45:38Z")

</div>

```
   Here lies Ginger Kerns

```

Got out of the truck. There were zombies.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Artyom177](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/48db29/32.png) [@Artyom177](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Artyom177)\
**Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 3:30am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/14 "2016-07-29T03:30:13Z")

</div>

Here lies Jef Major.

I know you used to be a janitor.  
But maybe you shouldn’t have tried to fight a zombie hulk with a mop

2010 - Winter, day 48

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Tawarochir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c0e974/32.png) [@Tawarochir](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Tawarochir)\
**Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 4:06am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/15 "2016-07-29T04:06:22Z")

</div>

[center]Here lies [Name Forgotten]

He was an idiot who tried to mug me, a quarterstaff-wielding two-week survivor, with his bare hands

He has earned a Darwin Award honorable mention, not in the sense that he did not die but because that isn’t over-the-top enough for an actual Award

He will not be missed

He had a cool cowboy hat though, I cut that up for scrap one time when I needed leather and didn’t wanna go outside

??? - Early spring, 2051[/center]

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Rot](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/rot/32/454_2.png) [@Rot](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Rot)\
**Post date:** [July 30, 2016, 3:39am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/16 "2016-07-30T03:39:24Z")

</div>

Here lies John Doe

Kill by me, wielding a Ruger 10/22

You were good target practice.

Spring, Day 4

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Findulidas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eada6e/32.png) [@Findulidas](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/Findulidas)\
**Post date:** [July 30, 2016, 5:30am UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/17 "2016-07-30T05:30:18Z")

</div>

Here lies John Doe

Your ideas were not impressive  
One could say they were most repressive  
So you took out your gun  
I did what needed to be done  
But I must admit that it was atleast a bit of fun

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![pisskop](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/pisskop/32/1327_2.png) [@pisskop](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/pisskop)\
**Post date:** [August 3, 2016, 4:56pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/18 "2016-08-03T16:56:31Z")

</div>

Here lies Gurg Hackpof

Was in the passanger seat while I reverse rammed turrets with a cube van.  
I missed one, and as the side door passed the turret he bravely took the brunt of the automatic weapons fire instead of me.  
I will rename the cop car in his honor. And use his backpack and baseball bat in memorium.

Spring, Day 2

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![ZoneWizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c6cbf5/32.png) [@ZoneWizard](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/ZoneWizard)\
**Post date:** [August 3, 2016, 10:56pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/19 "2016-08-03T22:56:52Z")

</div>

Here Lies @$$Holio,

Stole a police car at night without lights and just as dawn eclipsed, drove into a police barricade with turrets…catching a full clip to the face through the wind shield lol XD

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![lol2121](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/discourse.cataclysmdda.org/lol2121/32/2118_2.png) [@lol2121](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/u/lol2121)\
**Post date:** [August 4, 2016, 2:17pm UTC](https://discourse.cataclysmdda.org/t/epitaph-to-an-npc/11986/20 "2016-08-04T14:17:18Z")

</div>

Here lies starting NPC (forgot name)

Devoured by zombies.

Spring, day 1-4.

RIP

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